Funny one-liners, the ultimate collection! This is the complete listing of all the funny one-liners you see on the bottom of every page. Enjoy more than 2000 funny one-liners.


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Life’s disappointments are harder to take when you don’t know any swear words.

I am easily satisfied with the very best.

— Winston Churchill

Courage is the discovery that you may not win, and trying when you know you can lose.

— Tom Krause

To love and win is the best thing. To love and lose, the next best.

— William Makepeace Thackeray

Make a firm decision now. You can always change it later.

When all else fails, lower your standards.

You can’t be late until you show up.

Good judgment comes from experience and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

Time is never wasted when you are wasted all the time.

I fought the lawn and the lawn won.

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